I want you to think about this; when we put labels on parents such as “custodial” and “non-custodial” would you agree that we are creating a winner and a loser? I think it’s also safe to say we are also an image in the mind of the child, such as “my dad lost in the …
CUSTODIAL vs. NON-CUSTODIAL PARENT; A SELF-FULFILLING PROPHECY FOR FATHERS? Read More »
Speaking with a client earlier this week, he described new behaviors he was seeing with his estranged wife. His co-parenting relationship had become “different” once he moved out of the family home a few weeks earlier. To start with, he had difficulty reaching his children each time he phoned. There were excuses such as “they’re …
5 Warning Signs Parental Alienation May Begin To Occur. Read More »
Throughout most of my marriage, I had contemplated a divorce. All the warning signs were there, however, I would make excuses of why I should stay and in the interim, sacrifice my happiness. Then one day, I had my “aha” moment and realized I had the strength to go down this path and take a …
You most likely knew divorce was going to be a difficult adjustment for the entire family. You anticipated possibly losing your home, assets, and a major adjustment to your finances. However, you never dreamed divorce would include watching your children be taken away and being cast as the “villain,” the antagonist in your divorce story. …
A few months ago, my client “Tom” phoned me to discuss how his meeting with his soon-to-be ex-wife went. She had phoned him numerous times and each time laying a guilt trip on him. What was ironic is that she had filed for divorce yet was relentless in getting him to feel guilty about the …
guilt can lead to bad decisions in your divorce! Read More »
You’ve made the decision that your marriage is not going to work. You brought up the topic of divorce and hoping to go about this amicably. However, she didn’t respond, or you couldn’t agree to the terms. Your gut is telling you this is going to be a divorce war. Now what? I’m asked many …
Are you watching commercial after commercial showing families gathering for the holidays and thinking to yourself how sad and frustrated you are due to not being with your children this holiday? I tell my clients “You cannot control the holidays, but you can control how you go through them.” Let’s think about that for a …
GOING THROUGH THE HOLIDAYS WITHOUT YOUR CHILDREN Read More »
I received a few emails from women recently, informing me how as a woman I “should not” be working with men going through a divorce and that by doing so, I am merely giving men leverage against women. Words such as “traitor, conspirator, and even misogynist” were thrown around. My work with men is not …
Once your divorce settlement is final, you know where everything of value that you acquired during your marriage has gone. But what about the intangibles, like the love and emotional bonds you shared with another person? Where do they go? The truth is, it is often much easier to part with material things than the …
Reacting to your ex-wife isn’t usually the best move; responding is a much better choice. We’ll look deeper into the differences between the two, but first, let’s take this scenario as an example: The next few days are your allotted time with your child. As you’re rushing out the door to pick her up from …